I have prayed for eight years that I could have a daughter. We have been blessed with four healthy and hyper boys in our fifteen years of marriage. Yet the longing for a daughter never faded. I had been frustrated because I thought it was a righteous desire, yet never was blessed with a daughter like I had wanted, so I asked my bishopric member what I should do during my temple recommend renewal. I told him I had begged Heavenly Father for eight years.

The bishopric member, being so much wiser than myself, suggested that I ask God if I could have a daughter next. He told me Heavenly Father likes direct questions. (Don't beat around the bush) This seemed a bit pushy to me. I had never thought to just ask him outright. After going to the temple several times, much study and much personal prayer, Heavenly Father told me I could have a daughter. And it was because my faith was based on the same faith the Moses had when he parted the red sea.

We concieved in November of 2005 after the first month of trying. We knew this was our daughter. At about two months into our pregnancy, Chance (my husband) and I were praying together. My husband asked that our baby would be blessed with health. We knew this baby was not going to be healthy by the time we closed our prayer. But what could we do? In January of 2006 we had our first O.B. appointment. The doctor couldn't find the heart beat and took me in for an ultrasound. The doctor was real quick to give me an ultrasound and that scared me. Chance and I were excited to be in the same ultrasound room we had been in with each of our other children. The doctor said he was sure everything was fine but he wanted to check. We were about to see our baby girl. Nothing else mattered.

The doctor quickly found a fetus that was no longer viable. It was one of those times in my life I wish weren't happening but couldn't do anything about it except get through it. I cried. The doctor told me it wasn't anything I had done wrong and it wasn't my fault, but I still felt as if I were responsible. It was not an easy thing to be going through again. (it was my second misscarriage) Yet there I was, in the middle of it again.

I misscarried my baby about two weeks later. As I lay on the floor of my bathroom with a bloodied fetus in the palm of my hand I cried and told Heavenly Father I couldn't go through another miscarriage again. Heavenly Father told me she would come a different way, depending on what my decision was.

After prayer and lots of time we filed papers for adoption. It has been seven months of waiting through others' placments and rejection, but our baby girl is coming. A birth mom picked us about two months ago and we found out is pregnant with a little girl. She is currenly 9 days overdue but I know my baby girl is coming. This infant spirit is still coming to us. She is just coming a different way than what we planned originally.

I know my Father in Heaven hears our prayers. He hears mine and he hears yours. He knows the desires of our innermost soul. He may not choose to answer them the way we see fit, but He does answer them. We need to make sure we are worthy of hearing those answers.

The main lesson this experience has taught me is that God desires us to turn our lives over to Him. It is natural to want to be in control of our own lives but our lives are not our own. Things are much smoother if we don't fight to be in control. He is waiting for us to turn our lives over to him. If we do this one simple thing, our life trials will work themselves through and we will endure and succeed. I know Heavenly Father loves us all and wants us to be happy. His plan for us is far greater than we could ever imagine for ourselves and so are his blessings for us.

I hope maybe my story might help somone else that needs to hear this. May God bless you as he has my family.

Danielle
Hurricane, UT

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